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5 Things I Hate About Fall Getaway

By Emily Browning

· RealLife,Retreats
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They call me the RealLife curmudgeon. I’ve been to quite a few Fall Getaways, and although on the surface, it might look like I have had a good time there each year, it’s actually the worst! Here are my top 5 reason why I strongly dislike Fall Getaway:


Seriously, my hair loves 90 degree summers and 100% humidity. Nothing is worse than when October rolls around and you stop sweating every time you think about walking outside. Also, I generally get pretty upset when the leaves start changing – they were such a pretty green! Why do they have to go and turn orange, yellow, and red? Those are terrible colors!


Staying up until 1 am, eating s’mores, sharing secrets in a temperature-regulated cabin room with comfortable beds, making life-long memories? That’s just the pits. I’ll be holed up in my dorm room all weekend eating ramen for the 5th meal in a row and trying for hours to find something to watch on Netflix. Enjoy your bonfire, unencumbered view of the stars, and never-ending supply of cookies, coffee, and hot-chocolate.


I like to play hard to get. You want me to come to something, I’m not going to consider it. As the resident RealLife curmudgeon, it’s my duty to identify your kindness and personal invite as secretly devious. They really make it too easy for you to go if you want, what with offering a ride and providing time on Saturday afternoon to study. Something must be up with that. And what is with you caring about my life? Seriously, Becky, I know you’re my small group leader, but you don’t have to tell me you’re praying for me every single day!


I didn’t come to college to have fun. I came to learn and earn a degree. You actually want me to play flag football or paddle boat on a lake on Saturday afternoon? Is this a joke?


If I come back from one more Fall Getaway feeling refreshed and excited to finish the semester, I am going to flip my lid! I actually prefer reading the Bible and being a little bit confused, because even though I don’t feel like I get to know God any better, I can still go on with my day and get stressed out about all I have to do without giving it a second thought. At Fall Getaway, I find myself learning to surrender more of my life to Jesus and being comforted by Him. I’d much rather live my life on my own and be freaking out inside and wondering if I’m doing a good enough job.

So there you have it – what are your excuses for not wanting to go to Fall Getaway? Are they as good as mine?